Growth & Toys
Humming hawing, and rolling more Rs than a French man discussing politics over an afternoon espresso, what was once a little pooping, screaming and sleeping machine has quickly grown into a little girl, and at an absolutely amazing pace! Within 6 months the amount of development has been explosive, from doing absolutely nothing to actively interacting with her environment, engaging with toys, and sitting on her own power. If your situation was anything like ours, I had to man up and take on shifts to watch the baby while her mother went to work as early as 2 months into fatherhood. Those times could only be characterized in two extremes. Either utter relief that the baby slept most of the time, or absolute hell, where your personal measure is being tested by a baby actively trying to summon the gates of Hades through her screaming. To those fathers about to embark on their first daddy — child time in those early months I say, be prepared. Before your wife / partner even steps out that door have:
- Milk ready at the appropriate temperature — that tummy could be empty at any moment
- Swaddle on your shoulder — excellent for calming her down to a sleep state quickly
- Diapers (if cloth) built and ready to be deployed — because, well by this point you should know
- Patience — alot of it
But it does get better, much better, and very quickly. Astonishingly so in fact. I can’t seem to remember the last time the forces of the underworld were being summoned by our little baby, and she is only 6 months old. And here is where, from my perspective, the fun really accelerates. For one the interaction is amazing. You smile, crack a joke so terrible that if a corpse heard it they’d be thankful their dead, and she laughs. She bumps her head, you smile and kiss the little boo-boo and everything is better. You can read her books (although incredibly challenging because she tries to devour each page), bounce her, crawl with her and watch as she navigates the world around her with a wide eyed curiosity that left you years ago. As she grows, you grow with her. You also learn her cues, noises, hand signals and yes, cries. Rubbing her eyes with a dull whine — she is exhausted — nap time! A high pitched whine, for hunger — time to make a beeline for that fridge!
With a growing sense of the environment that mountain of toys that you started to accumulate with the baby shower has become more important than ever before. Prior to this stage of fatherhood I was generally in the camp of less is more, but when it comes to toy abundance, I am mixed. Don’t get me wrong I am not advocating for endless consumption of toys and leaving her alone in a pen with multiple gadgets and an “entertain yourself attitude”, but seeing how she interacts with different textures, shapes, sounds, it is worthwhile to have a wide variety. Just don’t think of a toy as a magical ticket out of parenting. Rarely can you simply leave her with a toy to her own devices because the range of motion (even if on the cusp of many things) is quite limited. Also things that make noise when they move are even better — but funny enough I would avoid toys that have a limited range of words, or a simple jingle because she doesn’t believe that shit for a second. To be perfectly frank, after a few rounds of Beethoven’s lullaby being actively murdered as it tries to escape $0.50 speakers, or a little bunny saying “I love you” endlessly and then proceeding to trying to sing you to sleep will drive you mad. I don’t know if she is gauging my reaction to these toys, or if she is thinking “this shit is too poor quality for me” but she doesn’t buy them for a second. But having said that a little noise whether it be a rattle, a squeak, or a whistle help bring the toys that you engage with to life in an exciting way. Just watching her eyes open and her brow furrow as she manipulates each object makes one reflect on when was the last time you experienced something “new”. And here in lies the most enjoyable part in being a dad in these early stages, sure things can be tough at times, but she makes everything in this little world seem new and fun again, and that is what helps make this journey so worthwhile.
